10 PRACTICAL things I wish I knew before having my 1st baby
I've read a few articles about "What I wish I knew before having a baby". There's a plethora of articles to read on this subject, most of them giving you "warm fuzzy" effect. Reading them gives me the same warm feeling you get when you pick up your baby to snuggle and inhale that "baby aroma". I reminisce about how I felt when I had my first baby and I realize that I have learned a few things from other moms over the years that have been very practical. There are things I didn't know when I had my 1st baby that I wish I knew. There are things that I wish I knew with my 2nd, 3rd and 4th, even my 5th, most recent baby! I am sure there will be lots more to learn in other pregnancies and babies to come (Lord Willing).
So here are 10 practical things I wish I knew before having my 1st baby
1. Get help with a Lactation Consultant IN the hospital! I am a former Breastfeeding Peer Counselor with the WIC program and a Lactation Counselor. I never knew how valuable these Lactation Consultants were until I became a Counselor and found out for myself! These Lactation Consultants are available in the hospital, but because they are also nurses, they will be in high demand. They may not be offered to you, so it's a good idea to request for one so you have that extra support. Sometimes as moms we just need the reassurance that we're doing it right. It can feel so new and even a little awkward to hold and position the baby to properly latch. The lacation consultant will help with all of that and more! Please be sure to ask for one when you're in the hospital.
2. Get hooked up with resources and groups when you are pregnant! Look for a LaLeche League, a Mom's group, a Baby Wearer's club, just anything you can get your hands on that offers support to moms. You may feel too busy for it now, but when you have stayed at home for 2 months post partum, finding another mom or two can make life a lot more enjoyable. They're in the same shoes as you and are experiencing so much of the same things. Support is so important! It really is a blessing to know you've got someone to call on when you're having a difficult Mommy day.
3. Buy Depends (adult diapers) before you give birth. They're much more comfortable than the wedgie pads they give you in the hospital. AND... they're even very practical to wear when you have that first post partum period which can be quite heavy.
4. You are very fertile after delivering a baby, especially if you're not breastfeeding. I don't know how exactly this works. I basically learned about it when I got pregnant with baby #2 just 6 months after baby #1 was born. Then I remembered... hmmm, I got pregnant with baby #1 just 6 months after my miscarriage. There must be something hormonal that happens in the body right after we give birth...something I cannot explain. Just know that it is very possible to get pregnant a few months after delivering your baby!
5. You can STILL get pregnant EVEN IF you are BREASTFEEDING and EVEN IF YOU HAVE NOT HAD A PERIOD YET! Again, something I learned about AFTER it happened to me! Haha, I am my own experiement. I had baby #4 when I was exlusively nursing, as in no bottles, no pacifiers, no supplementing... just 5 months after giving birth to baby #3. After talking with my OB she laughed and said "Yeah, it happens to some moms!" A woman I worked with who is a Dietician/Lactation Consultant said that some moms are just made to have babies. It is possible to be exclusively nursing and get pregnant...even without a period! Perfect example, Michelle Duggar!
6. You may be emotional... A bit more or a lot more. It's okay. There are all kinds of hormonal changes that take place even after giving birth until you wean! This is when peer to peer support really helps. I remember being pregnant with my 1st girl, not knowing she was a girl because we were getting surprised with her gender. My friend actually pulled me aside to share her experience with me and it was SO HELPFUL to get a little anticipatory guidance from her. She told me that after having her girl she was SO EMOTIONAL and it was so different from when she had her boy. She didn't anticipate to be so down. She would tear up at anything and was so sensitive. It took her a while to get back to her normal self. Knowing that I may experience it helped me prepare myself for when I actually DID experience it. When I remembered her words I went back to her and was able to talk it through with her. This is why I love support groups for moms. You can lend your shoulder to lean on as well as lean on someone when needed.
7. Don't get caught up with the baby gear trends. There's way too much money to be made in the baby gear business and lots of companies can see how moms just love to buy stuff. Save some money and call on respected friends who have been parents for years and ask them what baby gear has been most helpful to them and get what works for your household. (I.e. we don't use Cribs anymore, just playpens with a bassinet attachment-one purchase and many uses).
8. If you struggle with insomnia before and after birth, natural calm has been wonderful in helping me to get rest.
9. When you are nursing your baby and you feel the warmth of her diaper indicating that she is urinating, use a cue like "pee pee" in a sing song voice. When she gets a little older, like at 6 months you can start to use that same cue to help her use the potty. Look up baby potty training videos or read "Infant potty Training" by Laurie Boucke. It's saved me several diapers since learning this. I don't stress over it. I just take my baby to the potty if she wakes up dry and put her over the toilet and say "shi shi!" which is our local way of saying "pee-pee". She will go in the potty and then we do a cheer. Try it, it's fun!
10. During the crawling stage, let them safely explore for 10 or more minutes. Be sure to supervise them closely as you observe what they are taking an interest in. They will make toys out of ordinary household items! Forget spending tons of money on stuff they don't care for! Just remember that they will observe orally. So whatever they enjoy, make sure it's safe for them to put in their mouths. Example: my baby currently loves plastic cups, water bottles and Tupperware (good for observing orally). She also loves electrical plugs, wires and rubber slippers (not got for observing orally). You'll be happy that your baby doesn't want the latest, greatest most expensive toy with all the bells and whistles. The best toys are things you may already have. Another tip: When they get even older, cardboard boxes are amazing the BEST!
Thank you for reading my first "practical tip" post. I plan to have more blog posts like this when I think of other things that have helped me over the years. I know I will come across more moms with tons of experience and mommy wisdom to share.